Murder, Liberation, and Art in the Engineering Ivory: An Epistemically Aligned Qualitative Study That Illustrates the Engineering PhD Spirit-Murdering Experiences of Black Womxn

For decades, engineering scholarship has presented data to address the underrepresentation of Black womxn in the engineering doctoral community. American Society of Engineering Education (ASEE)’s Engineering by the Numbers Report (2021) statistically showed that only 57 Black womxn out of 10,037 scholars received engineering doctorates in 2021. Engineering scholars have theorized about constructs ranging from whiteness to explain the system, to doctoral socialization to explain the culture, to retention explain the experiences. Yet, even with the plethora of scholarship, the problem of underrepresentation has remained consistent with limited action towards change from the faculty, the program, or the institution. Therefore, I aim to address this problem by cultivating emotional resonance toward action within the engineering community regarding engineering doctoral program underrepresentation for Black womxn. Using Arts-Based Research (ABR) and Black Feminist Thought (BFT), this dissertation illustrates the engineering PhD spirit-murdering experiences of Black womxn. Six Homegirls intellectually contributed to this study by sharing their time and experiences through artistic expressions and homegirl conversations. Through the lens of BFT’s matrix of domination, the composite blog shows that spirit-murdering for these Homegirls: 1) is a targeted act that is dehumanizing 2) occurs because of the aloof nature and capitalist ideals of the engineering academy, and 3) causes further conflict in negotiating identities as Black, woman, professional, researcher, and student. Leaning on BFT’s grounding as an Afrocentric methodological approach, the composite poem illustrates that these Homegirls: 1) have a common, understood epistemology because of their shared experiences of being Black and woman in their current, multi-layered social locations, 2) identify strongly with their positionality and values while describing their outsider-within status, and 3) experience spirit-murdering in an emotional, intellectual, and spiritual way that then results in physical manifestations. Rooted in BFT’s ethic of caring, the hip-hop mixtape’s progression describes homegirl’s spirit-renewal tactics as: 1) owning their professional identity, 2) dispelling projected biases, stereotypes, and aggressions, 3) calling out inequities in their interpersonal relationships and program culture, 4) learning to set boundaries to protect themselves, and 5) standing on their ways of knowing and being.