“It's More Important That I Serve Someone Else's Needs. Or That I Just Don't Become the Problem”: Emerging Adult Women on Sexual Communication

Sexual satisfaction has been positively linked to both individual and relational wellbeing (Christopher & Sprecher, 2000; Davison, Bell, LaChina, Holden, & Davis, 2009). Further, sexual communication has demonstrated positive impacts on sexual satisfaction (Byers, 2005); yet, research by MacNeil and Byers (2009) found that most people in romantic relationships do not share their sexual preferences with their partner. According to Tolman (2002), women seem to be especially reluctant to communicate sexually, due to the particular societal restrictions placed on expressions of female sexuality and desire. This study aims to understand how emerging adult women communicate with their sexual partners in order to increase pleasure, what barriers exist to sexual communication for these women, and how gendered social norms are expressed in the process. Based on interviews with 19 women between the ages of 20-29, the findings of this study suggest that emerging women often place more weight on social expectations of appropriate female sexual expression than relational context when choosing whether or not and/or how to sexually self-disclose. Further, the women in this study were at varying stages of renegotiating their internalization of the prioritization of male sexual pleasure over female pleasure.